My First Exams and What I Learnt From Them

Well it's been quite a time since I last wrote.

The last time I posted was a few days before my exams started and I expressed how I wasn't feeling too stressed about things and that I was feeling pretty good.

Things didn't go the way I thought they would.

My Sunday before exams was planned out: go to work, tutor a student in my French class for our exam and then study math for myself.

My work shift is just 9am-12pm Sunday mornings, however I got myself into a bit of a jam because I took an extra shift right after.

They were desperate for someone else to work, so I step up because frankly, I need the money.

It wasn't too bad, but I ended up working 9am-5pm.

That set everything back at least three hours.

I only met my friend to help him study French at around 5:30 and we both had to leave at 7:15. 

I did as much as I could to help him prepare and taught him how to answer the question with the words already placed in the question.

I found out today once I walked past him in the hallway that he passed the exam which is great! He struggled with a failing grade for the majority of the semester, however he was able to bring it up in the end!

After I got home, I studied for math and then went to bed for a good night's rest before exams.

I woke up the day of my first exam feeling immensely sick.

The stomach flu had been going around just a few days before and I was convinced that I got sick myself.

There's not much you can do, you can't miss an exam unless a family member has passed away or that you're hospitalized. 

I went to school on Monday and wrote my first two exams, English then French, and felt progressively better throughout the day.

I thought I was getting better and went to bed early that night to be refreshed for my morning math exam on Tuesday.

I woke up and the stomach pains hit me harder than ever.

I couldn't eat, I couldn't drink, I had a headache and my mind was set that I had the flu.

Once again, nothing I could've done so I went to school.

I used my whole two hours to work on my math exam and when I walked out of the exam room, all of my symptoms disappeared.

There's nothing else it could've been except for anxiety. If that's the case, I've never had anxiety at a constant level that high before.

It was crazy to realize that it was anxiety, but then I figured that I must've been so stressed about my exams that I kept my mind busy with anything and everything, like taking an extra shift and focusing on tutoring someone else, to keep my thoughts from drifting to my exams.

Im so glad I have them over with and that I've started my second semester, however I learnt an important lesson.

In a few years from now, possibly even one year from now, those marks won't matter.

Your exam marks don't define you as a person. They don't test your knowledge in a skill rather than your memorization skill. It's completely unfair to tell students that they all learn in unique ways yet have a standardized test to challenge what we can remember, however there's nothing that we can do about that yet.

Anyway, your exam results are a number, a fraction or a percentage that you won't be able to remember in two years time. 

Those digits will not define you as a person or limit you to what you can do in your life.

If anyone else had exams I hope you did well and if you have any coming up, I wish you the best of luck.

One More Girl, no longer online

Balancing Out Stress From Work

I know that I've been less than faithful with my posting schedule, but everything is a little hectic at the moment.

School work is picking up, I'm starting to have more homework to do and more things to memorize; and on top of that I have my job and report cards to write.

Many people are confused when I say that I have report cards to write, but I do them for the swimming lesson classes I teach.

For the term I'm working, there's a total of 10 weeks, therefore 10 classes. By around the 7th or 8th week, we start to write report cards for the kids in the classes, hand them in to the looked over for week 9 and then hand them out on week 10.

I thought that it would be a breeze, but I was very wrong.

I have many classes with little kids and I can't say that many of them are passing.

They all have the same main problem which is they can't float.

While writing report cards, I can't wright the same thing in them because of they're friends within classes and parents compare report cards, that doesn't reflect too well on myself.

There's only oh so many ways you can word "Remember to squeeze your bum and to look up at the ceiling to help you float!"

Personalizing every single report cards wasn't the issue, it was the phrasing.

However I have managed to get almost all of them done, I believe that I have completed around 65 report cards and only have 10 more.

I didn't realize that I taught so many kids.

As you could imaging, 65 report cards with 10 more to go, schoolwork and general life events have made it difficult for me to write.

My Sunday evening was spent at the dining room table, report cards and worksheets all around me.

I love blogging, it's something that I want to do seriously when I'm older, but at the moment other things such as work and school will have to come first.

Admittedly, I've been feeling stressed because of the report cards.

I honestly wondered if teaching and writing a total of 75 report cards was worth it when I could make sandwiches or pour coffee into a cup for the same amount of money.

Then I realized that it was.

It's such a great feeling when a kid gets something right after weeks of working on it and you can pass them to the next level.

Writing so many report cards is worst is because you get to know these kids over the span of 10 weeks and you get to know their personalities and some of them you grow to like.

One father asked if I would have his daughter next term and I honestly hope so because even though she didn't cover all of the skills, she was always smiling and having fun and that's what makes my job great.

There's always going to be a stressful factor whether it's report cards, the environment you work in, the location, the people, the coworkers; but if there's something to balance out that stress, then you know it's worth it.

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Long Term Time Management

I really do promise that I try my best to post every Sunday and Wednesday, but as we all know, it's been more like every Sunday and Thursday (In this case I didn't get around to posting on Wednesday or even Thursday at that).

It's not that I can't write in Wednesday's, it's that I'm too tired.

I was actually on the phone with my boyfriend Wednesday night, I had my headphones and mic set up so that I didn't have to hold the phone up and my laptop was in front of me, taunting me to write my usual Wednesday blog post, but I kept falling asleep.

I felt awful for my boyfriend; I believe it was mainly a one sided conversation because I kept falling asleep every five minutes and I would be out for 10 minutes at the time.

I apologized a few times, but I definitely felt like I should've apologized a lot more because I did feel just awful about it.

This will bring me into my topic of today (like I've written about a few times before but will be slightly different this time), time management.

I've written about time and the importance of managing it before, but those were for short term reasons.

You see, I picked up an extra shift at the pool to make more money.

When I thought about the consequences this would have on me, I only thought about a few weeks into the future, maybe two weeks.

I didn't think about how it would affect me on a six week period.

I didn't think to manage my time in the long run and this has already caused me to be overtired, cram a little bit with schoolwork and to generally not have 100% control over things.

This taught me the importance of managing time within a long term as I will definitely be doing things differently for my next work term.

When you have an abrupt change in your schedule and you know it's going to be for a long period of time, plan ahead that far, look into your schedule that far into the future so that you know you aren't overworking yourself.


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Extra Shifts

When I started working at the pool, I subbed for many people thinking I was getting favours in for myself.

Today I realized that I wasn't.

I've been sick for at least half the week with a bad cold and a cough that won't go away.

There's a Facebook group for my work and you can post in it whenever you need to communicate with everyone on staff (for example: lost item in the staff room, sub needed, etc.).

Late last night (Halloween night), I posted in the group that I would really appreciate a sub teacher for today because I'm still sick.

I knew my chances were slim of finding a sub because it's Halloween night and let's be honest, the majority of staff is of age and were all at parties and drinking.

I wasn't too concerned about the Facebook post though because I subbed for so many people that I thought that at least one person would be able to do it for me.

Not a single person could take it.

At first I thought how many late notice shifts I've took for other people and how I thought one of them would've covered this shift for me, but then I realized something.

They don't owe me anything.

Of course a few people have directly asked me to take their shift, but they were never forcing me to take their shift.

Whenever someone else posted in the Facebook chat and I would say that I'm available, I'm not the only one in the Facebook chat and I don't have to say yes to taking the shift.

I thought I was doing it to get favours for myself for later, but in all honesty, I would be a sub, I got paid the money and that was that.

There's nothing more to say to that because I'm getting paid for their schedule.

I'm not subbing for later favours, I do it for myself to get money.

There's nothing with wanting to make money, but you can't expect to make money and get the days off that you want.

I went in today and it wasn't the greatest time, but it had to be done.

No one would sub for me but I can't hold anyone against that because it's their choice.

They don't owe me anything for covering their shift and getting paid for their shift.

Don't swamp yourself with someone's else's shift because if it's an absolute emergency, then the supervisors will get even more involved.

If you want the money, go ahead and pick up an extra shift; but if not, don't feel the need to take it.


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Balancing The Days

The most common example of balance in the world is Yin and Yang.

They say that there's the good in life, the bad in life, the bad in the good and the good in the bad; and that's said to be the balance of life.

I got a first hand experience this weekend of how the bad and the good will balance each other out.

I work both Saturday and Sunday mornings as a swim teacher.

Saturday was rather rough, but today was good.

First off, I can't catch little kids that jump in the water because of my thumb/wrist (I was giving my grandmother's dog a bath and I slipped intothe tub) and I was told that someone would be in the water with me at all times in case two of them jump at the same time (because that happens quite often), so I was feeling relieved about that.

Upon arriving to the pool on Saturday I realized that the only person that would be in the water with me would be a practice teacher.

I'm fine with that, but the practice teachers move around and I wasn't guaranteed someone there with me when I knew I needed them, so I borrowed one from someone else.

The practice teacher I stole from a coworker was a guy, probably had a head on me but he's sort of lanky and I thought it was going to be fine.

He came to the first class with me and one little girl started crying and refused to do anything.

I couldn't figure out what was wrong because she's usually really good and loves to swim, so I sent her over to her mom.

They came back over a bit later to the class and the mom explained that it was the practice teacher and she was afraid of him.

I managed to distract her and play games until the class ended, so that all worked out.

After that, I had my last class of the day.

I look forward to my last class, I have the two cutest little girls.

One is always smiling and ready to jump in while the other is really sweet, quiet and still nervous to go into water where she can't touch.

It's understandable at her age, but I don't think she'll be ready to let go of me in deeper water any time soon.

Halfway through the class, the little girl that's always happy to swim just lost it.

She didn't want to swim anymore, she was sobbing and her mom wouldn't take her out of the class and left her in the pool.

I still had another child to teach, so I called over a float teacher and got her to deal with the situation as I continued on with the class with the other girl.

That was my last class so I just left the pool and put it behind me.

It was a rough morning, it was the worst day of lessons yet.

I didn't know what to expect on today, but I was happy with the results.

My first class is a class with both the parent and the child, and I have 10 (parent and child duo) enrolled in the class.

Today, only 4 of them showed up.

It was the most bizarre thing, but I loved it. 

It was a lot quieter, I wasn't buzzing, I could watch what each kid was doing and not think "Oh no, did this kid already do it yet?"

It was so nice, I didn't do as many songs as I usually would, I didn't have to yell as much so it was nice and calm first class.

After that, I have a class where only one kid is enrolled in it, but she didn't show up so I got 20 minutes in the hot tub which was the nicest thing ever.

After that, I only had 3 more 45 minute classes.

I usually find them brutal, but I was able to fill the time up easily and we did fun things, so it was a really nice.

I left the pool feeling pretty good about today and today's lessons.

I feel as though I still have a lot to cover, but I still have at least five more weeks of lessons.

I wasn't as overwhelmed as I can be on Sunday mornings and it was nice to be able to take a breath and really think about what I'm doing and not worrying about the next thing, the next drill, the next song or the next game that we're doing.

I had a bad day at work on Saturday, but I had a great one today.

We always have good days and bad days no matter who we are in he work and what we do, but the days will always be there to balance each other out.

One More Girl, no longer online

Don't Hold Back

As many of you know, I volunteer at a museum. 

More specifically, an immigration museum.

As a volunteer, I tell the volunteer coordinator when I can go in and she adds me on the schedule accordingly. So far I'm going in every Saturday afternoon until the end of November.

Seeing as this past Monday was Canadian Thanksgiving, she asked me if I could go in and said that she understood if I had family plans. I told her it was no problem and I would be there for the shift she put me for.

I walked in and it turns out that she forgot to add me to the schedule. Not knowing what to do and not wanting to make my mom drive back already to pick me up, I decided to stay and to just walk around, talk to our visitors and see if I could help them out with anything.

Because I made that decision. I met some wonderful people.

We have two exhibits at the museum and I met one group of people in an exhibit and they were looking for something in the opposite exhibit, so I told them that and said that I'd be more than happy to escort them over to what they were looking for.

They were pretty thankful for that and I led them over to the exhibit.

I ended up giving them a tiny tour of the exhibit and talking to them a lot about the stories of the immigrants from France, the story of the Deportation of the Acadians and a few other stories that I knew. I told them a few personal stories of my own and they said that they loved that I was sharing my stories with them because it enrichened their experience at the museum.

I was so honored to be able to meet and to talk to these people because they were just wonderful and the sweetest people.

Not too long after that, I ended up chatting with an elderly woman who immigrated to Canada from Scotland. 

She was telling me that for her, her brother and her sister in-law, the experience was long and awful. Her brother and sister in-law got so fed up that they decided to immigrate to New Zealand instead.

I was chatting with her about her whole immigration process and I asked if she had any regrets.

She told me that she packed her bags in Scotland at 18 years old and hasn't regretted it one little bit.

She then proceeded to ask me about myself. At first she thought I was a university student, but she was rather shocked when I told her that I'm still in high school.

She then asked me what I wanted to be when I'm older and I told what I want to be: a travel writer.

She told me that every time I get a paycheck, I should take 10% of it, put it away and never touch it so that I could retire at 55 and live comfortably. 

It was really good advice and I'm going to follow it. She also asked me where I wanted to go, so I told her my top destinations but that I was also hesitant to go.

She looked me in the eyes and gave me advice that I'll never forget.

She told me to go for it.

She told me to do what I want to do and that it's a good thing to be scared. 

She told me that she wasn't sure if she wanted to immigrate to Canada or Israel, but she said that if she didn't like it in 5 years time, she could change her mind. But 30+ years later, her she is, still in Canada.

She packed her bags at 18 to find something better and I'm going to do the same.

I can't say that I'll immigrate to another country, let alone another continent when I'm 18, but I'm not going to let fear hold me back from going to new places and meeting new people.

Great minds must think alike because this lady and my amazing older cousin both gave me the same advice.

Don't hold back.

And I won't.


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A Perfect Balance And Pumpkin Races

My last post I mentioned how I'm going to not put too much on my plate, I'm not going to take any more extra shifts unless I was sure I could do it without missing something that's important to me such as something with friends that was planned in advance, homework or shifts/special events at the museum that I volunteer at.

Today I had my shift at the pool in the morning, but two weeks ago, I said that I could work a shift the same evening because I thought my schedule would be clear.

Turns out that I mixed up the dates and it interfered with plans that I made with my friends.

Knowing that I had plans with friends that afternoon, but also realizing that I took the shift, I told my co-worker of the original shift and we worked something out! I said that if we couldn't find someone else to take the shift, then I would cover it because it was my mistake and she was completely fine with that!

I ended up being able to find a sub for her the day before, so everything worked out perfectly.

Not too far from where I live, every Thanksgiving weekend, there's an event called the Pumpkin Races.

The Pumpkin Races are where people grow pumpkins that are over 1000 pounds and they paddle across a lake in the pumpkin that they grew.

It's a huge event that many people go to. A lot of it is a fundraiser for many things but there are also stands all over, for example one was a chili cooking contest, another to raise money for a school trip, another to raise money for a school playground and more, but then there were also concession stands and bouncy castles.

It's quite the event.

Either way, this is the first time my friends and I have gone to the event and we had a great time. 

Two of my friends joined me and one of the fundraisers there was a dunk tank. For five dollars, I could get six balls to throw, so I paid five dollars and we each threw two balls.

My first throw was a little off, but I nailed the second one! I hit it right on the target and dunked the girl! I felt bad because she must've been freezing, but she probably went and got changed after that.

I was really proud of myself, that was my first time doing something like that, so it was pretty exciting for me.

After that, we watched the races, drove home where one of my friends came to my house (the other had to go back home for Thanksgiving dinner) and we watched a movie.

I didn't have to go to the Pumpkin Races, I could've told my friends and they both would've understood seeing as they both have teaching jobs in skating, but I changed my schedule.

I rebalanced my plate so that it wasn't overflowing with work. 

I would've been at the pool all day, I would've worked so much that I would've been exhausted and cold for the majority of the day, but because I found another sub, I wasn't overwhelmed with my day, there was a perfect balance between work, friends and family.

You'll always have the chance to try and rebalance your schedule so that one thing doesn't outweigh the other. Sometimes you won't always have the chance to do this, but I'll always recommend that you try to because it will make you feel better throughout the day.


One More Girl, no longer online

Having Too Much On Your Plate

Yes, it is Thursday and not my usual Wednesday post, but here's my reason as to why my bi-weekly post is late:

I was tired.

I haven't had the greatest sleep pattern since school as started, I've been going to bed very late with headaches, waking up early with headaches and it's not the greatest cycle for me.

I spend the majority of my day with headaches and I shouldn't be.

With all of this going on, I also work all day Saturday and then Sunday morning.

By the time Sunday afternoon comes around, I'm tired and I don't want to do all that much.

My plate is already full. My weeks have been pretty eventful.

Yesterday, I was in class when I received an email notification.

I'm in a Facebook group for work, and every time someone posts, I get an email notification.

It was a co-worker of mine looking for a teaching substitute to cover his 4:15-8:15 shift.

Four hours is a long time to be working as a teacher. It's a long time in the pool and you're bound to get cold within the first hour and a half.

I didn't know whether or not I wanted cover his shift, but after talking with my mom, I decided to take the shift because I could get more experience, get as many favours as possible, and I do need to earn money.

I ended up really enjoying the shift. I did get very cold about halfway through, but I made it to the end.

My last class was suppose to end at 8:15, but it went over until 8:20-8:25. There's absolutely no problem with that, it's just that I was so tired.

I got home at maybe 9:15, had supper, lied on my bed with full intention of writing a post, but I kept drifting off to sleep.

When I took that extra shift, I thought that I was doing it for me, I thought that I was doing it to earn money to put towards a trip, but I realized that I was wrong.

I also took that shift because I didn't want my coworker to worry. I didn't ask why, but I didn't want him to worry the whole day over if he would get a substitute for the shift or not.

It's not my responsibility. We are a facility with 30+ employees, I'm not the only one who would've been able to take the shift, I was the first to offer.

I shouldn't feel stressed or anxious about my evening if I'm taking someone else's shift. I'm doing it because I can, but sometimes I do it because I think I have to.

It is not my responsibility to make sure that someone else's shift is cover when I'm not working. Of course I can take the shift if I don't have any homework and I'm feeling okay, but there are supervisors that could have also covered his shift.

I should feel stressed over someone else's shift, that's not what I signed up for.

I'm going to plan my day and make sure that I have everything under control before I take on any extra shifts.


One More Girl, no longer online

A Team That Helps & Supports You

I was in at the pool today doing some subbing hours and my first few classes were good, but then I had this one class with two little boys at a beginning level.

The smallest one said that he could go into the big pool and his mom agreed to that, so I took them to the big pool.

One of the lifeguards must know these guys because he signalled me to watch the smaller one.

After doing 25 meters in the big pool, he told me that he was starting to get tired.

Knowing that this couldn't end well, we all started another lank to head back towards the small pool and we'd swim there.

This kid started to get really upset, started to tell he that he wasn't tired, almost started to cry and I told him that we could go back in later.

He couldn't touch at the bottom of the little pool and he was constantly putting his head under for as long as he could, so I'd say that it was a good five minute battle before I got him to sit on the wall and wait while I did a drill with the other little boy.

Well, I didn't get him to sit on the side of the pool.

The same lifeguard who warned me about this little guy came by and said to him "She's a really fun teacher, but you have to listen to her, she knows what she's doing," and he finally sat on the wall two minutes after that.

I was really thankful that he came over and said those words to him because it really did help to get him to listen to me and he helped me get things under control faster than I would've on my own.

By the time that the class ended, I struggled so much with this kid that we didn't have time to go to the big pool, and I told him that, and he just stop and dropped.

He started to cry and he just sunk to the bottom of the pool.

Being frustrated with him and knowing that I had to get to my next class, I just picked him up by the armpits and got him out of the pool.

His mom saw me struggle the whole time with him and saw me have to physically drag him out of the water, and she started with "Are you not listening to your teacher? You're in big trouble," but I just handed his mom his report card and walked away.

My next class was a lot more cheerful because it was a class where the parents are in the water with toddlers and babies.

It's quite a cute class, but I never taught it before. I ran out of activities to do and songs to sing about halfway through the class, so I asked one of my supervisors to help me out and he agreed.

I was so happy when he came in with a new song, a few games and some toys.

You can't really teach them anything because they're too young, it's mainly about them being in the water and playing games and that wasn't something I was used to, so I was really thankful when my supervisor for in the water with me.

Being already worked up from my previous class, being able to go up and ask my supervisor for help was great.

Like I mentioned, I was running out of ideas and I started to get myself worked up again over that, so having my supervisor willing to get in the water with me almost gave me a flood of relief.

In a workplace such as the pool, it's really fun but it can get tense and stressful at times, and I felt as though today was a tense and stressful day.

Getting the chance to work with a team that will look it for you and help you in anyway they can, wether it's get in the water and teach a class with you, be a second authority figure when a kid is acting up or to help you even get them in the water.

I'm really lucky to be working with that staff that I'm currently apart of, and if you're working and feel to stressed or tense, don't be afraid to ask someone else for help.

Even your supervisors will be will into help you whatever the job it.

People say that when you start working, it's almost a little team. I didn't understand that until now and I don't think that I could describe the aquatic staff at the facility I work at as anything but a team.

I find that they really support you when you need it and that's something you can use to help you when you're struggling.


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Extra Work Pays Off

As many of you already know, I'm a swim teacher.

To become a swim instructor, you have to go through two courses: AWSI (Assistant Water Safety Instructor) and WSI (Water Safety Instructor).

With the courses, you have to do practice teaching just like any other job.

They make you practice teach to become more comfortable in the environment, teach something to a class that isn't made out of other teenagers in the same course as you, learn how to deal with different types of kids/teens/adults and become familiar with how facilities run.

During the AWSI course, you have to practice teach for a total of 8 hours, but for WSI you have to practice teach for a total of 12 hours.

I got my AWSI hours done pretty quickly, but I never actually finished my WSI practice teaching hours.

Out of the 12 hours, I had 5 done, so I still had 7 hours left to do.

While doing my AWSI hours, I already knew a lot of staff members and they all told me that they never really finished their hours either. After already doing 8 hours, it seems a little funny to have to do another 12 hours of the same thing.

I understand if people doing all of the hours if they're uncomfortable being on their own or if they're having trouble understanding how to manage a class, but I felt comfortable with it.

I was intending on doing all of my hours, but when I heard that my course instructor (also one of the figures in charge of hiring for the facility I work at now) was leaving, I quickly dropped off a resume so that he would be the one interviewing me.

In the end, it payed off because I was hired right out of the interview!

Shortly after, I got a text from my friend asking if I could sub for him, so my practice hours were quickly forgotten about.

Since then, I think that I've had about 15 hours of teaching on my own.

However, yesterday I received something in the mail that was telling me that the AWSI program was changing, and I wasnt sure how I'd be affected by it.

I don't have my WSI certificate or badge even though I completed the course because I never handed my practice hours in.

I had to go in today to look for lesson plans from someone whom I'm subbing for on Sunday, but I figured that I could've also get my hours signed off.

When I arrived, all the lifeguards working were out on the pool deck and I didn't want to bother any of them, so I went to the Aquatics office.

I'm pretty sure that my boss would've signed off my remaining hours because I've taught alongside with her, but the only person in the office at the time was the whole pool supervisor, so basically the boss of my boss (or as I call him: The ultimate boss).

He's a nice guy, so I don't feel all that intimidated by him, but I always have in mind that he's the ultimate boss.

I told him that I had a few hours left of practice teaching, but shortly after I got hired, I had a sub offer so I took it and I forgot about them, and seeing as the program's changing, I wanted to see if I could get my hours signed off.

Out of 4 sheets, 3 of them were already signed, so I only needed him to sign one sheet.

He told me that he shouldn't be signing them because I didn't actually do it, and that my course instructor and one the two supervisors who hired me shouldn't have hired me if I didn't have my hours completed but I think that that's when he remembered what I did.

When my friend was out sick and no one knew if he wrote his report cards for his classes or not, I stayed behind at the pool for two or so hours, writing them for him.

It wasn't my responsibility at all, I didn't have to do it, but I did and it was an action that didn't go unforgotten.

Although he never mentioned that, he still signed the papers.

I wouldn't have been fired, but I possibly could've been told not to take any more shifts until I finished the hours.

I offered to finish them, but he told me that there's no point because I've been in the water so much already and I'm already teaching classes.

In the end, the papers were signed, but I'm going to be careful for the next week or two. If he does call me and says that he wants me to finish the hours, then so be it, it's not the end of the world.

I am thankful that he did signed the paper for me, but he did it fairly. He knows how I teach and he knows that I don't feel uncomfortable in the water and that I'll do whatever I can to help the kids learn and move up, so it wasn't as though he didn't give it a second thought.

Either way, extra work payed off for me big time today.

I'm not implying with this post that you should skip out on work, this post was to show that doing something extra can not only help you gain experience (for me it was writing report cards), but it can also add a good word or two to your name.


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Take The Time To Relax

I know that I have the biggest softball tournament of the year coming up in about a week and I still have a bad ankle, but when my friend asked me to sub for him and teach swimming lessons, I couldn't refuse.

In the facility I work in, there's a rule that states teachers have to leave their work sheets at the pool in case an emergency comes up and you can't make it in, someone can cover your shift and know what to teach the kids.

My friend doesn't leave his stuff there, everyone knows it but it's not really been a problem until recently.

Awhile back ago, I had to write his report cards for him because he didn't leave his stuff at the facility and no one could get ahold of him to see if he did them or not.

I stayed back to do them, an good thing I did because he never did them.

I got a text from him today asking if I could sub for him today, and as I mentioned before, I agreed.

I asked him what the classes were and where the worksheets/lesson plans were, but I didn't get all the information.

He told me the levels that I were to teach in order and the names (or the majority of the names) of the kids in each class, but I didn't have an lesson plans.

I would've gone over to his house to pick them up, but I couldn't because he was out of town by the time he asked me to sub for him.

I understand that it's not necessarily his fault that I couldn't get the lesson plans, maybe some last minute emergency came up and he couldn't make it into work today, but it's not my responsibility to write some up, for someone else's classes, either.

If there's a rule that says leave them in the work place, leave them in the work place and make it easier for someone who will cover a shift for you.

Either way, I went in early and made up some lesson plans before the classes.

I felt as though the classes I taught weren't well done because I was constantly saying "Um..", reading the lesson plan that I wrote in a rush to have one for each class, and I just wasn't confident in what I was saying.

Had I had lesson plans that were already made, I could've studied them and know what I was doing better, but I didn't have lesson plans and I didn't feel confident in what I was teaching.

When I got home, I have no other way to explain it other than I wasn't feeling all that great and it was because of my teaching shift.

You could say that I felt down about it, but I was also tired and frustrated, so overall I wasn't in a good mood.

It was as if I was disappointed in myself.

Something I realized today is that it's alright to be in a foul mood once you finish something or once you get home.

It's okay to go take a bath and relax, it's okay to stay in your bedroom alone, it's okay to listen to music so loud that you can't hear anything else, anything you want to do that can either distract you it help you relax from whatever event could've taken place.

When I get in a foul mood, I usually don't want to talk to anyone, and you don't have to. However, I would recommend for someone else's sake that if you don't want to talk to anyone yet you get a phone all or a text, tell them something along the lines of "Hey, I'm not feeling all that great at the moment, can I get back to you later?"

That way, you aren't hurting anyone, you aren't making others think that you're ignoring them and its a really polite way to say that you need some space for awhile.

You don't owe anyone anything and you don't have to pretend to be all cheerful when you're honestly in a foul mood, everyone gets that way at times.

Take whatever time you need to just breathe and relax because you owe that to yourself.

i've said this many times before, but your own health comes first, so don't feel as though you have to entertain for other people because you don't.

Take a moment for yourself, and make that moment however long you need it to be.


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Silent Battles

As some of you may know, I volunteer at an immigration museum, but I haven't been having steady shifts because my schedule is all over the place at the moment, however I was finally able to go in today.

My shift had a quiet start, I started in two of the hands-on stations; one where you can take a little citizenship quiz and another where you can colour a suitcase.The colouring of the suitcase station is mainly for younger kids while parents look around, but sometimes we have teens and parents that join in!

I met some lovely people while at the citizenship table and I also met this family with three adorable little boys of the ages four, two and a half and a baby that I say might've been six/seven/eight months or so.   

I'm not one to usually go out of my way to talk to a stranger as you all know, but it's different in a work environment. I'm not sure why I find myself more outgoing there, but maybe it's because people are interested in what you're saying and are curious. 

I'm not sure what it is, but I love talking to the people who come through the museum because people are visiting the museum from every corner of the world. 

Seeing as it's an immigration museum, we have visitors that have actually immigrated through, what's now known to be, the museum. They love to stop and chat about their experience and where they came from and it's honestly such an amazing thing to hear their stories.

Anyway, after those stations I was then at the information booth alongside a co worker.

The co worker I was with is actually an immigrant herself (not through the museum, however) and today I got to ask her about her learning experience.

Where she grew up, she would learn things and the teachers would go on about how "This is the Belgian way to say it...This is the French way to say it...This is the Canadian way to say it.." so she ended up learning how to say specific things in many different languages and that blew my mind.

I was amazed by that and she went on to teach me how to say a few numbers the Belgic way when she told me that she was tired.

I asked if she was going home after her shift and it's what she told me next that made me admire her even more.

She told me that she never went home after her shift at the museum because she had to go work at one of her other jobs out of three.

She told me what she did and what her hours were and I was...shocked. 

She's working three jobs to pay off her appartment and to put herself through a university course here.

She told me how she wanted to find a cheaper apartment because her current one was starting to be too much for her alone, and she also told me how her current landlords won't do anything for her.

She explained to me that she had a broken window since this winter and they won't come by to fix it and that she's struggling with a rat problem. She's tried many things to get rid of the rats, but it's not working. 

She told that sometimes it got to be too much.

I know that I said "She told me.." many times, but I wasn't quite sure how else to word it besides "She went on.." and to me, that sounds almost negative, but I wanted to listen to her story.

I wanted to listen to her story because I didn't know it.

I didn't know her story and I probably never would've been able to guess it because she always has a smile on her face.

She told me that she was tired yet she kept smiling, she was happy, she was kind, she was energetic, she was friendly, approachable, caring and overall amazing.

I've only known this woman for a little bit, but she has been smiley, happy, kind, energetic, friendly, approachable and caring since the day I met her. I can't imagine how long she's been that way and will continue to be that way.

I never knew that she was struggling with any of that, but she reminded me of something really important.

Everyday, people everywhere are struggling with their own silent battles. We don't know what position the people around us are in, so we should always be kind and not try to make things worse for other people.

If someone needs a reason to be kind, there it is. 

You honestly have no clue about other people's battles until they tell you it themselves.

Although it was sad to hear her story, I have nothing but respect for her. She's just incredible and amazing. I can only hope that someday I'll be as strong as she is.

Silent battles are the ones that take up the most energy and strength, but no one else is aware. It's almost like struggling to swim while all the people around you are holding on to a flotation device but you can't ask for one; maybe because your mouth is underwater or maybe because you don't know if that person needs that flotation device more than you.

In the end, silent battles are the strongest fought battles. You can never know who fought one or who is currently fighting one.

Either way, being kind to someone might make the battle a little easier for them.


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My First Ever Work Shift

Oh my goodness.

Today, I had my first ever proper job shift.

As some of you know, I'm a certified swim teacher and as I was lounging around my house this afternoon, I had a family friend text me to say that he was sick and he needed a sub tonight to cover his classes and he asked me if I could.

I figured that this would be a good way to ease myself into teaching on my own  rather than to have my own classes for a first time experience.

I was pretty nervous before I started. Me being me, my mind automatically raced to all the possibilities of things going wrong. Easy enough to say, I psyched myself out.

However, a pool supervisor told me that he would be in the pool with all of the classes today, so if I needed a hand I could call him over to help. That helped me relaxed a bit.

My first class was with an older level, but there was only one girl out of two who showed up.

Honestly, only having one girl to teach boosted my confidence.

I didn't have to jump into a class with six, three years old, kids where half of them didn't listen. I had to teach one girl who was ready to learn, liked to swim and I slowly gained confidence during that first class.

I had a total of five classes in the three hours of my shift, and that's not bad at all.

I was worried that I wouldn't have enough things to do with all the students, but I ended up having plenty to do with almost all of the classes.

When it came to my last lesson, it was a private lesson for a little boy in one, I started to run out of things to do, but he was pretty interested in the bottom of the pool, so for the last two minutes a let him see the bottom of the pool in between two last floats.

I was impressed by most of the kids attention. Of course, it's harder with the younger kids, but all of the older kids were great!

I had a younger group with a little boy and a little girl in the group, but the little boy's aunt and grandmother were also at the pool. Usually that's no problem, but his aunt came over to talk to him during the lesson and that completely derailed and distracted him and he wouldn't listen to me anymore.

I couldn't tell the aunt that I need her to leave in fear of seeming rude, so I said "Hey, hop back in, bud! The lesson isn't over yet!" and the aunt understood that she had to step back for a little while longer and she understood that.

My only other troubled time was when I had six students from the ages of three to five. One of them was not listening to me at all, he didn't want to participate in the class and do what everyone else was doing and the supervisor saw me struggling a little bit, so he came over to help me out with him.

I taught the other five kids while he dealt with that one student.

Overall, I think I had a pretty good first shift.

I was nervous about so many things, but I got over those as more lessons went by and there was other staff around if I needed any help.

Your first shift is always the one you get the most worked up about whether it's with nerves or anxiety, but as soon as you get it over and done with, you realize that it isn't nearly as bad as you thought it could be.

I'm really happy that I took this shift, I feel more comfortable teaching in the water (granted I haven't made any of my own lesson plans) and I feel as though this is a job that I can do well.


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